The pandemic has brought on a myriad of extreme emotions. Grief comes from the loss of loved ones, plans, and resources. Anger may be felt when expectations are not fulfilled. The lockdowns have left many isolated and lonely. Mix in joy, worry, and disappointment, too. Isn’t it interesting how emotions we rarely feel have suddenly surfaced because of the pandemic?
Emotions can be tricky. Some emotions are obvious and outright, others are quite complex. Envy, for example, maybe masked in anger or irritation. Some emotions are more difficult to process and harder to name. But whatever emotion you are feeling, it is real and valid.
How we respond to how we are feeling could be problematic though, and we tend to fall into one trap or another.
WE BYPASS AND BELITTLE OUR EMOTIONS
When we do this, the emotions become repressed. They do not go away, they stay.
WE GET CARRIED AWAY.
This is when we let an emotion bleed out towards other aspects of our lives. When we have a tendency to get carried away, we may bring a work-related frustration towards our spouse, friend, or children. The emotion rules over our action. Being aware of this tendency and acknowledging the presence of the emotion will empower us to act accordingly.
WE NEED TO LEARN HOW TO BEFRIEND THE EMOTION.
Emotions point us to a need not acknowledged. We need to learn how to capture these as they can teach us so much about ourselves.
A healthy emotional response can lead to better emotional health. Our goal as adults is not to be happy all the time but to have healthy and appropriate emotional responses. Unfortunately, some of us have not developed the capacity to express our feelings.
We don’t have to declare to the world what we are feeling but we do need to make these emotions make sense, at the very least to ourselves.
We do need to appropriately express our feelings.
As author Haemin Sunim put it, “When life disappoints, rest a moment.”
Rather than skimming through our emotions, we should allow ourselves to feel. When we refuse to feel, we let our emotions get the better of us. When our responses become reactions, we retaliate or deny. When we are hurt, we have to feel the hurt and then heal from it. When we lose, we should grieve, and then learn. When we are afraid, we must acknowledge our fear so that we may have faith. Let us feel our emotions so we can find the appropriate responses for them. — WITH PAU DE VERA
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash