We shall be sharing some excerpts from my book, “The Beauty of 40: Unwrapping the Gift of Midlife” in our next few blog posts. Do enjoy these snippets from my midlife musings, and give some time to reflect on your journey as well. We would love to hear about your thoughts and experiences.
“Buti na lang nung grade school and high school, ‘di ako crush ng mga crushes ko! Truth ‘yan, ‘di hugot! Such lesson at 40, no! Kung siguro ako yung “crushable” at may reserve na manliligaw, marami akong hindi natutunan! Kinikilig at umasa man ako, carry lang!
Dahil hindi ako crush ng crushes ko, nabuo ko ang sarili ko on my own worth and goodness. Hindi naman ako kagandahan or ligawin! At buti na lang ganun, kasi maayos ang proseso ng pagbuo ko ng aking adolescent identity. I did not anchor my true worth on anyone other than the “self” that evolved based on my gifts!”
Who was your teenage crush? Was he the quiet nerd who knew everything but talked to no one? Was he the captain of the basketball team who helped your school snag the district championship? Or was he the calm and collected peacemaker who always knew what to say?
We all know these types, and we’ve probably all gone through that phase where we tried our very best to catch their attention, probably volunteering for something we weren’t really interested in or going way out of our way to be somewhere we thought he’ll be.
Oh, those crushes! They made our hearts go thumpity-thump, but more than that they taught how us look squarely at ourselves, deal with our emotions, and manage what seemed like failures. Because, let’s face it, not all of us have the drop dead gorgeous looks or the mega wattage personality to make our crush look our way. And in truth, we probably would have already been kilig to the bones at the thought of our crush looking our way.
However, those instances of frustration, those moments of exasperation only added to the color and texture of who we are and what we became. Had everything come our way, we would not have had the emotional maturity and the psychological tenacity which later on helped us achieve personal goals and aspirations. So the next time you look at your yearbook and wonder about the Prince Charming of your dreams, be thankful you left him in fairy tale land for the good man you are with today.
“The Beauty of 40: Unwrapping the Gift of Midlife” is available at https://shop.kerygmabooks.com/.